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Side effects of Chemo ... Continue

  5 days before these pictures and videos were sent to me, I got a text from Jess, the first few lines read...  "Sis today I'm in my feelings. Thinking about so many t hings. I know this is going to be a battle, but I wasn't ready for the pain and the emotions roller-coaster. Not being able to drive my daughter to school or even have the energy to comb her hair is breaking my heart the hours in the bathroom vomiting at night is just exhausting..." In that moment I knew the "you got this " texts that people are so quick to send (because what else could they say) were no longer motivating her. What do you say to that text? I knew I needed to see her. We spent the day together and although I know she didn't feel well it gave her the motivation she needed without me saying a thing. That night we traded the Casamigos for a little wine and I even got her outside for a bit. I was happy to get these videos a few days later -- My sis got her stride back... we all...
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My sis said if we are going to do this, let it be on my terms.

 " One important key to success is self-confidence. An important key to self-confidence is preparation." - Arthur Ashe I was shocked to see the new hair cut even before the chemo started! Of course, I loved it, definitely a change as Jess has never had short hair as long as I've known her... her response, "well It's going to fall out anyways." Come to think of it, I've never seen an up-close battle of someone fighting cancer except for in the movies, / tv shows. You see the actors/ actresses portraying what seems to be a traumatizing moment, them waking up hair falling out, I truly couldn't image. My sis said if we are going to do this, let it be on my terms! Taking control of the situation even knowing the outcome not only takes strength, but an immense amount of courage. Imagine knowing what's to come and still preparing for it through the tears... I showed up to her house that weekend (she partied for 3 weekends in a row before chemo started y...

Day:1 -- First Day of Chemo

 I asked Jess to record a video if she was up to it of her experiences as she beats this, she sent this last night... 3/26 The Resilience was truly felt through the phone as I received these images. It reminded me how strong my sister is "Fearless does not mean you aren’t afraid; it means you accept the fear and move forward anyway." —Brianne Joseph

The first thing she said -- "I need a drink"

  "I have invasive ductal carcinoma"-- I imagine her world stopped once she read the results. You know when people mention hearing something traumatic -- they describe zoning out. It's almost like they are there but they aren't really there. When she shared with me, I wanted to cry and not out of sadness, but out of anger, because --- Who will I drink with now? I think if I were sad, I'd be acknowledging the fact that my sis was sick-- which nah! Maybe sick in the head, YES! but far from sick. Would we still laugh through it like we've done everything else? Will the one who I've laughed with during some of the hardest times of my life still have the same, "we are going to get through this like we have before" attitude? 2021 I had just had my daughter, adding in another mouth to feed on top of the one I was barely making ends meet for -- I came to the hard truth I could no longer afford to rent my apartment, what did my sister say? Come live with...